They burned the beans

What do you do when your coffee bean factory burns the beans?

I say the first time it happened the conversation went something like this;

            “Oh, no! We burned the beans!”

            “Ahhh, crap! That’ll really tank the bottom line this month.”

            “Jeeze, look at them. They’re almost black.”

            “I know; we’ll call them something.”

             “YES!”

            “How about French Roast?”

            “Hell yes. We’ll even charge a little more.”

And that is how and why we came to buy and drink that stuff.

My wife actually likes it.

But then again, she’ll even eat burnt toast.

Tight suits are apparently in right now.

That’s good news and bad news for guys like myself.

Myself, and hundreds, no doubt thousands, like myself, who haven’t bought a new suit or sport coat in quite a while.

We’ve gained a few pounds and our jackets are tighter. So technically, we’re right in style.

The problem is; tight suits only look good on trim guys.

The rest of us look like Oliver Hardy.

I even have the derby hat.  

EMBERS

He had a book and a small, dying fire.

The embers weren’t bright enough to read by, so he tore the cover off the book and threw it on the embers.

It smoldered for a moment then burst into flame.  The flame lasted just long enough for him to read the first page.  And give him a little warmth.

When the flame died down he tore off the page he’d read and threw it on the fire. Burning it gave him just enough light to read the second page.

The second page gave light to the third, the third to the forth, and so on through the whole book.

Each bright burning page gave light to the next, until the last page had been consumed.

And by then the dawn had come.

Donald Duck turned me on to classical music

It’s true. When I was six or seven I saw the Disney cartoon of Donald Duck taking a trip down the Grand Canyon Donkey Trail.

As he sat on the donkey, ready to go, the guide, or maybe Daisy Duck, took his picture. The donkey’s eyes went from giant black pupils to tiny pinholes. And off Donald went, on a blind donkey, down the harrowing trail, to the music of Purdy Grofé’s The Grand Canyon Suite.

Every kid the theatre laughed hysterically as Donald screamed and the donkey wandered precariously near the edge.

Over and over Donald Duck and the blind donkey veered to the edge, closer and closer each time. That afternoon I went home humming the Grand Canyon Suite. And the joy of that cartoon and the music never left me. Many early cartoons were scored with classical music and I loved them all. I was hooked on the music. The cartoons, not so much.

Novel idea

My novel idea is that you should buy one of my two novels.
Or buy both. They're on Amazon right now. And three more coming in late January or early February.
Kindle is not far behind.
If you start reading when you take off in New York, you'll be finished by the time your plane lands in Los Angeles. If you're a fast reader, maybe Dallas.

My get rich slowly plan

My first novel “Heavenly Hash” is now available on Amazon’s Kindle.

Only $2.99.

If everyone who reads this blog buys it, I’ll make twenty bucks.

I believe one can install a free app of Kindle on one’s computer.

Hello? Is anybody out there?

The cat wears a fur coat

As obvious as that may seem, my wife doesn’t quite get it.

The cat sleeps up on a shelf in my studio quite a bit of the time.

I was working in there yesterday, when my darling wife walked in, glanced at the cat, and said, ”It’s a little cool in here, you should turn the heat up.

I pointed out that I was wearing only a T-shirt and I was fine.

Her response was immediate.

She said, “I don’t care about you. I don’t want Jessie to go sleep in our bedroom. She’ll get hair all over the bedspread.”

When I pointed out that Jessie was plenty warm, because she wore a fur coat — all the time. My darling wife left, walked to the bedroom and closed the bedroom door.

I’m sure she was joking.